Healing – an on-going process

Healing is a process, a process that can take months or even years.  As I mentioned in an earlier post I’m still healing from my first surgery almost two years later.   Physical healing is dependent upon many factors; the procedure, your overall health, how hard you’re willing to push yourself, even your attitude can play a big role.  Of the two mastectomies I’ve had, the modified radical mastectomy has been the most challenging to recover from.  I didn’t realize how damaging a modified radical could be until I had the surgery.  They not only remove the breast tissue but also most of the lymph nodes under the arm and the lining of the pectoralis major (the large chest muscle).  Because I lost so many lymph nodes, 24 in all, my body had a hard time processing the extra fluid that resulted from the wound.  I needed to be diligent emptying the drains and clearing the lines to try to keep up with the fluid.  I was so eager to have the drains removed that I feel like I influenced my doctor to remove them a little too early.  The result was that I blew up like a balloon and had to go in to have the surgeon use a needle to drain the excess fluid that built up a week later.

I also had to be faithful with my exercises.  My under arm was very sore and I could barely lift my arm to get dressed.  I started stretching as soon as the doctor gave me permission.  The first and easiest exercise was just walking my hand up a wall as far as I could, pushing a little further each day.  I did that at least three times a day.   Once it healed a little, and I had permission from my doctor, I began driving.   Just turning the steering wheel was a workout.   The more I used my arm, the better it felt.  It did take several weeks and I had to be careful not to push it too far but I was successful in regaining most of my motion.

The emotional healing is another story.  It took several months to see that I was still the same person.  I realized that being diagnosed with breast cancer and having a breast removed was not the end of the world.  The chemo and radiation also complicated things but I’ll go into that at a later date.  Healing is a personal journey.  You need to prioritize it any way you can and know that you’re not alone.  There are thousands of women who have walked the same path.